JERSEY SHORE – 2/10/12

February 10th, 2012 | 3 Comments | Posted in Jersey Shore Season 5

Welcome back! Some random Shore news before we get started with this week’s episode. Pauly’s spin off, The Pauly D project, will premiere on March 15, in the coveted 10:30 pm, post-Punk’d, pre-Punk’d repeat time slot. In other news, turns out Punk’d is still on the air. And speaking of Pauly, thanks to everyone who sent me the names of other DJ’s that I’ll probably never check out. I appreciate the feedback, but I’ll just have to take your word on whether or not they are successful as I had never heard of any of them.

We start where we left off last week, and the week before that, and the week before that, with Mike trying to call Unit to bring up the Snookie drama. Unfortunately for Mike, Unit is “out of town for a while,” which is what Italians say when they are in prison. So unable to beat the dead horse any further this episode, Mike decides to go to bed. (It’s getting really hard to limit the “Mike is old” jokes when he goes to bed at 7:30).

But it’s out with the old and in with the new, as we have a new nickname on the show! As described by Vinny, the “Sweat Box” is crowded, hot, and smells like B.O. And no, he’s not talking about Snookie’s vagina. He’s actually talking about Aztec, the minor league of clubs in Jersey. Vinny always stood around like droopy house plant at Karma but he sure did come alive at Aztec. Perhaps he was just out of his league at a classy place like Karma, what with their “bathroom attendants” and “straws for your drinks.” Vinny is more low-key, so it’s no surprise that he would fare better at a place like Aztec, a club which appears to have spent upwards of $130 on decor. Feeling more relaxed and at home at Aztec, Vinny tries to pick up not one but two girls, because just like 95% of the women who vacation on the Jersey Shore, Vinny needs a Plan B.

This creates a huge logistical problem however, as Vinny barely has enough personality for one girl. Mike and Ronnie are unable to help Vinny with his problem, as they are locked in a serious conversation trying to figure out why all the guys on the show wear their Grandmother’s sunglasses. But luckily for Vinny, Deena is desperate for attention, I mean, willing to help out, so she takes one for the team and dances with the less attractive girl while Vinny goes for the hot one. (Wait, you mean no guys at Aztec wanted to Jersey Turnpike with Deena, so she was available to help Vinny? Seems impossible!) The less attractive girl doesn’t even realize that she has been put on the proverbial back burner; she just assumes that the nice linebacker wanted to dance. Sadly, despite the efforts of his wing-ball, Vinny ends up striking out with the hot girl, as it turns she is a lesbian. This revelation is a complete shock to Vinny, and frankly everyone, because after all, she does have soft features! Everyone knows that lesbians are genetically incapable of soft features!

3 thoughts on “JERSEY SHORE – 2/10/12

  1. To take a line from your recap; “I am turned off by your misspelling of not one, not two, but THREE of the main character’s names/nicknames”.

    Roger does not have a “d” in his name.
    JWOWW has two w’s at the end of her nickname.
    Snooki does not have an “e” at the end of her nickname.

    If you are going to recap a show, take 2 seconds to find the correct spelling of the character’s names. Otherwise, it just makes you seem lazy.

  2. I totally get you, casper33, but to Reese’s defense, JWoww’s line at the beginning of the show makes me cringe every week, whereas I laugh at the misspellings in the recap.

    I think Reese’s misspellings of the “actors'” names is proportionately appropriate to the atrocity of JWoww’s butchery of the English language. IMHO, it reaffirms their irrelevance nicely:)

  3. I think the jwow thing was intentional. i thought there was a post about how she doesn’t deserve the extra w. LOL!

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