The next morning, Mike is in such bad shape that he has trouble remembering the stripper’s name, as well as which parts of the script are his, as he rips off a series of comments that were clearly written for Pauly. Nonetheless, due to a weak field this episode, Mike ends up winning the Pauly Quote of the Night, with “Her name might have been Anita, because she was like ‘I needa cigarette, I need french toast’….. you know what, I need you to get the hell out of here.”
After the success of the birthday party, the cast decides to branch out the next night and have a couples night. Only problem is, Deena doesn’t have any a date (I’m pretty sure the two guys she brought home in earlier episodes have since changed their names and went into hiding). But luckily, Deena also has no shame, so rather than be left out of couples night, she cold calls Ronnie’s friend, who agrees to go out with her after failing to think of an excuse on the spot. (Really, all that guy could come up with was “uh….. uh…… uh…… uh…… uh……. uh…… sure, I’ll meet up with you. I’ll get to be on TV, right?) This scene really bugged me, as Ronnie clearly dropped the ball on this one. So far, Ronnie has been a completely different person this season. He’s calm, he’s thoughtful, he’s wise….yet he lets his friend get guilt tripped into a date with Deena? Come on, man! You gotta look out for your boy.
(Before we move on, since we’re talking about begging here, I’d like to issue a plea to MTV. Dear MTV, for the love of god, stop jamming sneak peeks of “I Just Want My Pants Back” into Jersey Shore episodes. Really, this is getting pathetic. Anyone who actually watches that garbage is going to feel like the guys who hooked up with Deena: full of shame, regret, and embarrassment. I realize the irony of my next comment, considering it is part of a Jersey Shore recap, but “I Just Want My Pants Back” looks like it could possibly be the worst show ever created. I’m not a marketing expert but I don’t see how inserting unfunny snippets of one unproven show into an already established show is going to help the unfunny thing. It’d be like taking one of my backne jokes and inserting it into a real column…. just not going to work!)
Sorry, back to the Shore: For a brief moment, I started to think that the cast has matured. I mean, a couples night almost sounds like something normal adults would do. Of course, I’m betting that normal people don’t announce that they are skipping out on couples’ night because they need to have sex immediately, as Snookie and Jionni did. So 30 seconds in and one couple is down…. not a great start to the night. This actually proves to be an element of foreshadowing more than lust, as the entire couples night ends shortly after arriving at the club, as Sammi gets into a fight.
