Written by: Jason Rappo

Week three begins in rather bizarre fashion. Mike is in bed with the same whore from last week. He then calls her a cab and sends her home. Mike starts telling us how tired he is, as he goes to sleep on the couch patio. The problem is that a pigeon keeps flying down onto the couch causing Mike to fall off the couch. Here’s my question: if you’re so tired and need to sleep so badly, why don’t you just GO BACK TO THE BED YOU WERE JUST SLEEPING IN!?!? Why the hell do you continue to try and fall asleep on an outdoor patio when you have a perfectly good bed inside that you were sleeping in ten minutes before? I know “bed hopping” is listed under the activities section of Mike’s resume, but if you’re just going to keep getting woken up by a pigeon, maybe you should just take the hint and go back inside. This isn’t rocket science. By the way, it’s just my luck that … Continue reading →

Written by: Jason Rappo

Just wanted to start out by thanking everyone for the overwhelmingly positive feedback on the first column. I do read all the comments here and I appreciate them all — positive or negative. Two things I wanted to respond to before we get to week 2:

1. Yes, it’s “Deena” not “Dina”. I rushed through my proofread last week and that thought totally slipped my mind. To be fair though, I think “Dina” is the more widely used spelling of that name. Using 2 “e’s” in Deena is probably like the equivalent of girls who spell their names with “i’s,” instead of “y’s.”

I had a joke planned for the end of that, but then the light bulb flashed and I realized that J-Woww (speaking of ridiculous names…) spells her name “Jenni”. Clearly that’s not just a coincidence. Don’t you love when life imitates art?

2. I didn’t actually fast forward through any dialogue last week. It was just part of the shtick. However, I will not joke about it … Continue reading →