Written by: Jason Rappo

We start off with Snooki waking up and trying to call Jionni. She was stunned when she kept getting voicemail. She could not fathom why he would not pick up. Hey, genius: he just left Italy like 8 hours ago. Did you think he’d get service in the sky or something? This reminds me of this one girl I once went out with many years ago who texted me 3 times before I got home from our 1st date asking if I got home safely (it was like a half hour drive). Let’s just say say there was no second date. Of course, she wasn’t a big TV star and I wasn’t starving for fame, so it’s not like I had ulterior motives to see her again. I assume Jionni will reappear at some point tonight because he ::cough:: really cares about her.

Pauly, Deena, and Ron are working the counter at Luigi’s. They were all complaining about hangovers. I would assume waking up with a hangover for Pauly and Ronnie … Continue reading →

Written by: Jason Rappo

So we start where we left off last week. Snooki is being taken away in a cop car for allegedly hitting that same cop with her car, despite both cars being completely devoid of any damage whatsoever. The boys go to pick them up at the police station. Pauly is worried that they will all be kicked out of Italy. Why is that a concern of his? What are the 8 of them a package deal? If Snooki got banned from Italy, why would the rest of them get banned from Italy? Anyway, the boys bail the girls out and Snooki escapes with nothing more a slap on the wrist.

By the way, I’d like to apologize in advance if this turns out to be a short column. I had 11 hours of classes today, and still have homework due in the early afternoon tomorrow that I haven’t finished. On top of that, I’m dealing with some minor personal issues of my own right now. I almost called out sick … Continue reading →

Written by: Jason Rappo

We begin week 7 with a scene titled “Mad Pizza.” I heard that was the original title for this show before they settled on “Jersey Shore.” Ron, Snooki, and Jenni head to Luigi’s for another hard day of work. Snooki complains about how much she hates work and tells Jenni they should just do their job of folding pizza boxes really slowly to get through the day. Jenni then lectures Snooki about how important an honest day of work is, and how they need to maximize their job performance so they can make ends meet. Snooki agrees and then proceeds to work more diligently than she’s ever worked in her life. At least that’s what I thought would happen. Instead, the 2 girls just sat there and ate pizza while not doing anything even remotely productive for their job. I’m going to guess it’s not the first time those 2 have sat around eating pizza and doing nothing all day. Has the thought ever crossed anyone else’s mind what these 8 … Continue reading →